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And the moral of the story is 'An idle mind is the Devil's workshop...'

So it was a lazy Friday afternoon, and we (me, Sajeeve and Jude) were kinda bored so we decided to play this game and I had no idea it would turn out to be this sacrilegious. So if you are a religious fanatic please do not continue reading this... I am pretty sure the story we concocted is blasphemous in at least 3 religions, Jude (a cousin) seems to think so anyway. I was too busy laughing and trying to bring some modicum of sensibility (not to mention respectability) to the story but my cousin Sajeeve is blessed with a very fertile imagination and once he unleashed it there was no going back...
So here it is... 

Karen : She was moping the floor and singing along loudly with the radio.
(I was thinking along the lines of a cute M&B... she a hard working woman and he a wealthy arrogant guy who gets drawn to her calm, strong & sensible nature)

Sajeeve : But deep down she was contemplating if she could forsake her conservative principles.
(This is when I knew the ‘cute falling in love’ part of the story was never gonna happen)

Jude : lol, you guys are nuts

Karen :She figured she would never go that far... cause it clashed with her values.

Jude : There was a skip in her step as she heard the familiar honk of Harry's car as he pulled into the driveway

Sajeeve : But she thought to herself, why should I look at that indolent bastard.

Jude : Thankfully she caught a glimpse of a picture of Jesus on the wall and banished all such thoughts.

Sajeeve : The way she controlled her lithe body while moping was so impressive that Harry could not take his eyes off her.

Karen : Since he was ogling at her indecently, she poured that bucket of soapy water on his face...

Sajeeve : That only served to make him more aroused. Her refusal to display even a modicum of cleavage angered him.

Karen : She thought where are my girlfriends when I need them the most..

A little chat in between..
Jude : ok now this is a lesbian story?

Karen : No, I was thinking that, cause you guys are turning it into something porn like...
Story continues…

Sajeeve : He could not resist the myriad possibilities for having some fun

Jude : There was loud bout of thunder and lightning

Karen : and she knew that he was drunk and starting to get violent...

Sajeeve : Little did she know he was a cold blooded killer who wanted to stick the mop down her throat.

Karen : He opened the fridge, he wanted a beer to cool his temper.

Jude : Only to find out that she had thrown out every can of the vile liquid.

Sajeeve :"Hello Harry", said Moses as he walked into the room with a book in his hand.

Jude :"Wow!”, Harry thought, that must have been some strong stuff I smoked today

Sajeeve : Moses's boots meant that granny woke up to the harmonics emanating from his long firm footsteps against the wooden floor.

Sajeeve : "It's nice to meet you Harry, I honestly didn't believe Jessica when she told me she had a boyfriend", granny told Harry

Karen : When Moses appeared the fear of God came into Harry... and he vowed to turn over a new leaf. But then Eminem walked in rapping and acting all cool and Harry thought wait, I must be hallucinating.

Sajeeve : Jessica started mopping Moses's feet to subtly indicate to him to not give ideas to Harry

Karen : But Moses said, “Woman are you moping my feet... me of all people? I spilt a sea!!!”

Sajeeve : A closer look at Emimem revealed it was actually Abraham all clean shaven. Jessica was terrified, she had only the mop to her defense. Abraham was staring at her like a ravenous dog in heat with saliva dripping from his mouth. Jessica mopped his mouth, Abraham felt touched by the act, no one had wiped his saliva before. Harry and Moses were pissed off with the histrionics, they decided to leave and spend some time on the Xbox...

Jude: while Jessica and Abraham made out to the tunes of rap music.

Sajeeve : Grandma walks into the room and is shocked to see what’s going on, she goes into a cardiac arrest. Abraham says she is dead anyway, we’ll check her after sunrise

Karen : But Moses is reluctant to leave her lying there and performs a heart surgery. He opens up her heart and raises the mop high above her... the blood gets separated in each chamber

Sajeeve : He then realizes that Grandma has just fainted and not had a heart attack. Harry is pissed off at Moses's .

Karen : Meanwhile Abraham gets ready to sacrifice her cause he thinks that's why she has been cut open like that...

Sajeeve :The three of them regroup,they look around & jessica is missing. They are shocked, scared.. they look down and grandma is also missing.

Sajeeve : They get so depressed with the situation that they decide to call 1 hooker and 2 strippers home to change the mood.

Karen : But things get messed up and Judas turns up instead

Sajeeve : Abraham calls the hooker company on phone and says "Go, and gather the babes of Israel together, and say unto them: Appear unto me, we surely need you now, I will bring you out of affliction into my land overflowing with milk and honey.”

I guess by this point we were laughing too much to contribute anything useful... and fyi we did not mean to disrespect anybody living or dead by this crazy story. 

Comments

Zak said…
lol ok! u missed the line when u said "and eminem walked into the room"
Karen Xavier said…
its there saj...
mahesh said…
this has the potential for a cracking short humorous play.
Karen Xavier said…
Mahesh, yeah with a little fine tuning... it could be better. Nice to know you found it humorous...
littlemuch said…
This story is brilliant! Very hilarious! Couldn't stop laughing. You guys should play this game more often
Karen Xavier said…
Tina, yeah we plan too... but without the Biblical characters.
Jane Hamilton said…
HAHHAHAHA!! What is wrong with you guys?! HAHHAA!

You were right about one things, though - "I had no idea it would turn out to be this sacrilegious". Inspite of this warning from you, i have to agree, I had no idea it would turn out to be THIS sacrilegious!!!!! :D
Karen Xavier said…
Jane, I know!!! Even I was squirming as the story progressed... guys will always be guys, God made them like that :D

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