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Funny Friends...

So I am a sucker for quotes, I collect them and write down the best ones in a pretty little book. In college I used to scribble them all over the desk... any empty space I see, will eventually be filled with quotes. My friend Shilpa (who used to sit near me through all the 4 years of college) even mentioned it on her blog... I was that vandalistic in nature. Over the years, I started jotting down quotes or phrases from people around me... At my previous job I came across one of the funniest guys I know, Dinesh Padhmanabhan. He used to have us (me and another friend Manney) in splits... he was that witty and hilarious, here are a few of his one liners.

If you are not doing anything with what you get, you should not ask for more.

Don’t worry about things that do not have any impact on your appraisal.

If time doesn’t move, how come deadlines move?

When things don’t work, you shouldn't be working too….

If GOD can make so many typo’s while writing my fate, why not me?

(there was this article about mermaids being spotted somewhere, so I asked him if he believed in them)
I don’t know whether I believe in God or not… forget about mermaids!

(this was when we were in the midst of a discussion, trying to finish a project on time... )
Ideally the best thing to do right now would be to push the deadline.

(this was when we were munching on some masala coated peanuts...)
Masala coated peanuts is just fancy salary

Dating is better than drinking, either way you spend money.

The world’s toughest job is to get the work done by somebody else.

There seems to be something fundamentally wrong.. I guess it started from the day God thought about creation!

If they say God is everywhere, then they cannot deny the fact that he is in my shun list also.

Nobody understands my problem, except God… cause He creates 'em!

Every problem has a common solution – Ignorance.

Critical Data! What the heck? After all it's just a collection of 1's and 0's

Nectar is the right sector. (while discussing alternate business ideas like starting a pub)

(on the current economic state)
Who said that the Job Market is bad?
Try these organizations...Al-Qa'ida, Lashkar-e-Toiba, Lashkar-e-Jhangvi, LTTE...

(while discussing how google has become an indispensable part of all our lives...)
Google can lead us to hell also...

It is wise, not to point out your boss’s mistake.

If work is worship, I choose to be an atheist.

Cloning should be made legal: I'm tired of being me!

Your misery may not be entirely your fault, but is there any solace in pointing your fingers skyward?

There are a lot of good qualities in me, unfortunately they are seen only by people I trust.

Self-motivation is just a fancy name given to hidden agendas!

Most qualities in a person are like a mirage. They appear promising from a long distance but when you get close enough you become disappointed.

Here are a few more quotes from my friends, just remembered them...

I didn't know latitudes and longitudes could change a person's attitude. Anju Sabu

Patience is a virtue, but it may not necessarily be mine. Shilpa Nair

We are God's best gift to everyone. Nitya Nirmalkumar
(while discussing people and how we wished we could be as rude and insensitive as them, but we can't because we are God's greatest gift to mankind... Nitya cracks me up!)


Susan Deborah said…
Now this cracked me up completely. If you were my friend (in real), I bet you would have my quotes also jotted down here (too much blowing of my own trumpet).

For every quote you wrote, I was thinking of another one-liner in response.

Well, you are surrounded by witty people, online and offline.

Hope you've been well. Long since I saw you posting.

Joy always,
BackStage said…
My brother and sister are the best in giving all these super quotes that crack me up completely... nice, funny post.
Karen Xavier said…
Hey Susan, do a post on your quotes... should be interesting to read. I like it when people randomly make up quotes, its a talent... so you have every right to blow your trumpet. Well, take care...

Hey Gibsy, yeah... siblings are the best when it comes to quotes. I should really start noting them down more often. At work with a computer in front of you, its easy to document quotes of friends. At home, amidst all the laughter and fighting... I forget to document them.
mahesh said…
If one knows that there is a scheduled power outage, does it mean that "Knowledge is power-cut"
Karen Xavier said…
Mahesh, that's a nice one.. :)

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