Skip to main content

Funny Friends...

So I am a sucker for quotes, I collect them and write down the best ones in a pretty little book. In college I used to scribble them all over the desk... any empty space I see, will eventually be filled with quotes. My friend Shilpa (who used to sit near me through all the 4 years of college) even mentioned it on her blog... I was that vandalistic in nature. Over the years, I started jotting down quotes or phrases from people around me... At my previous job I came across one of the funniest guys I know, Dinesh Padhmanabhan. He used to have us (me and another friend Manney) in splits... he was that witty and hilarious, here are a few of his one liners.

If you are not doing anything with what you get, you should not ask for more.

Don’t worry about things that do not have any impact on your appraisal.

If time doesn’t move, how come deadlines move?

When things don’t work, you shouldn't be working too….

If GOD can make so many typo’s while writing my fate, why not me?

(there was this article about mermaids being spotted somewhere, so I asked him if he believed in them)
I don’t know whether I believe in God or not… forget about mermaids!

(this was when we were in the midst of a discussion, trying to finish a project on time... )
Ideally the best thing to do right now would be to push the deadline.

(this was when we were munching on some masala coated peanuts...)
Masala coated peanuts is just fancy salary

Dating is better than drinking, either way you spend money.

The world’s toughest job is to get the work done by somebody else.

There seems to be something fundamentally wrong.. I guess it started from the day God thought about creation!

If they say God is everywhere, then they cannot deny the fact that he is in my shun list also.

Nobody understands my problem, except God… cause He creates 'em!

Every problem has a common solution – Ignorance.

Critical Data! What the heck? After all it's just a collection of 1's and 0's

Nectar is the right sector. (while discussing alternate business ideas like starting a pub)

(on the current economic state)
Who said that the Job Market is bad?
Try these organizations...Al-Qa'ida, Lashkar-e-Toiba, Lashkar-e-Jhangvi, LTTE...

(while discussing how google has become an indispensable part of all our lives...)
Google can lead us to hell also...

It is wise, not to point out your boss’s mistake.

If work is worship, I choose to be an atheist.

Cloning should be made legal: I'm tired of being me!

Your misery may not be entirely your fault, but is there any solace in pointing your fingers skyward?

There are a lot of good qualities in me, unfortunately they are seen only by people I trust.

Self-motivation is just a fancy name given to hidden agendas!

Most qualities in a person are like a mirage. They appear promising from a long distance but when you get close enough you become disappointed.

Here are a few more quotes from my friends, just remembered them...

I didn't know latitudes and longitudes could change a person's attitude. Anju Sabu

Patience is a virtue, but it may not necessarily be mine. Shilpa Nair

We are God's best gift to everyone. Nitya Nirmalkumar
(while discussing people and how we wished we could be as rude and insensitive as them, but we can't because we are God's greatest gift to mankind... Nitya cracks me up!)


Susan Deborah said…
Now this cracked me up completely. If you were my friend (in real), I bet you would have my quotes also jotted down here (too much blowing of my own trumpet).

For every quote you wrote, I was thinking of another one-liner in response.

Well, you are surrounded by witty people, online and offline.

Hope you've been well. Long since I saw you posting.

Joy always,
BackStage said…
My brother and sister are the best in giving all these super quotes that crack me up completely... nice, funny post.
Karen Xavier said…
Hey Susan, do a post on your quotes... should be interesting to read. I like it when people randomly make up quotes, its a talent... so you have every right to blow your trumpet. Well, take care...

Hey Gibsy, yeah... siblings are the best when it comes to quotes. I should really start noting them down more often. At work with a computer in front of you, its easy to document quotes of friends. At home, amidst all the laughter and fighting... I forget to document them.
mahesh said…
If one knows that there is a scheduled power outage, does it mean that "Knowledge is power-cut"
Karen Xavier said…
Mahesh, that's a nice one.. :)

Popular posts from this blog

Santhi Nilayam, School for the Mentally Challenged...

After a long long time, I visited the special school I used to work in, and the kids have all grown up...tiny tots now taller than me and sprouting facial hair!!! I was flummoxed... gosh, time changes everyone and everything. Wonder what changes they saw in me... anyway, I was just happy to be backthere. Went early to catch sight of that yellow school bus turning the corner and to watch all the kids tumbling out. While I was working there, that yellow bus turning the corner always marked the start of an exciting day. Right from the moment the kids hit the ground, the fun starts... that place will always be shrouded in hues of warm sunshine in my memory, it is a great place to be.  On the way to school, came across a few students... The special school, Santhi Nilayam (means Abode of Peace)  Great place...  The school bus and the kids... The assembly itself is heartwarming, a kid recites the prayers and the others repeat after him, in their characteristic sounds and half utterances.  T…

The Ten Commandments of Christmas

Last Sunday in church, leaflets with the following 'Christmas Ten Commandments' were handed out and the parish priest Fr. Joe Andrews discussed them with the congregation.   You shall not leave 'Christ' out of Christmas, making it 'Xmas'. Christ is the reason for the season.You shall prepare your soul for Christmas. Spend not so much on gifts that your soul is forgotten (a good confession is a nice way to prepare your hear for Christmas)You shall not let Santa Claus replace Christ, thus robbing the day of its spiritual reality. (Prepare yourself with prayer and the Word of God.)You shall not neglect your church. Its services highlight the true meaning of the season. You shall not neglect the needy. Share they blessings with the many who will go hungry and cold unless you are generous.You shall not neglect thy family during this season. You shall not forget the elderly and those who are lonely at Christmas time.You shall not value gifts received by their cost. E…

Grandma's Caramel Cake...

Everybody in my family loves this cake, its my grandmother's recipe and it can be tweaked during the holiday season to form a delicious Christmas fruit cake. The ingredients are simple to remember, you just need equal  quantities of flour, sugar and butter and the cake is guaranteed to come out great. Ingredients 400 grams maida or all purpose flour
400 grams sugar
400 grams butter
8 eggs
3 teaspoons vanilla essence
2 teaspoons baking powder
1 teaspoon baking soda
dried fruits and nuts 
brandy or rum (optional)
I've taken 400 grams of butter, sugar and flour cause I wanted to make a large cake for Christmas. You can scale the quantities down to half and make a medium sized cake. Let's start with caramelizing the sugar, from the 400 grams of sugar that you have set aside for this cake, take bout a quarter of that (100 grams) and start heating it in a dry vessel. I usually drop in another handful (bout 50 gms) of sugar to get more of the gooey caramel when I plan on adding b…